Little Shop of Horrors
by outerelf
Summary: Rewrite of the Dentist Scene from 'Little Shop of Horrors' where Sadist meets Masochist. crack, and please read a/n at the beginning first.


_a/n: _**_Important Notice:_**_ This story will not make sense unless you've watched "Little Shop of Horrors" first. Period. I can give you a link to a youtube video where this scene takes place, but other then that, you had to of watched "Little Shop of Horrors" first._

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Perceptor craned his head back to look up at the plain, nondescript building. He glanced back down at the paper, advertising the building, and back up, before walking through the door.

It was completely empty, not even a assistant was in sight. Silently he sat down in one of the seats, before his optics half-shuttered as a scream began to echo in the building. Unconsciously he drew both legs up, until he was crouching on the seat.

The door down the hallway opened up, and instantly he was off his seat, to look at the femme being led out of the room. The femme nurse, a blue motorcycle, looked at him odd as he peered closely at the red truck femme. "Well? How was it? What did he do?"

The femme couldn't really talk; only make gagging noises, as she gestured wildly to her jaw. Perceptor made a soft critical noise as he peered down into her mouth. "Yes, they have to do that to remove the jaw. Consider yourself a lucky girl."

Both femmes shot him incredulous looks, as the blue femme began guiding the smaller femme out. Perceptor went back to go crouch on his seat, fairly vibraiting in suppressed anticipation.

A Seeker came storming out, yelling, "Who's next?"

"Me! That would be me! Perceptor!"

Perceptor shot up straight, standing on his chair as he raised his hand. The Seeker glanced at him, before glancing back at one of the leaving femmes. "Hey! Does 'that' have an appointment?"

Perceptor smiled winningly at the femme as he pointed at himself, at her, and gave her the 'Ok' sign. Her optic ridge rose, but she snapped, "Ask it. I'm off duty."

Perceptor bounced up to the Seeker, noticing the name-plate nearby that said 'Starscream'. "l've been saving all month for this. l think l need a root canal. I'm sure I need a long, slow root canal."

Starscream frowned, before glancing into Perceptors obligingly open mouth. Starscream stood on tiptoes to glance into the mouth, as Perceptor sank down to allow full examination. "Come on." Starscream grunted, before turning and walking down the hallway.

"I have a history of dental problems."

"SHUT UP!"

Perceptors optics flickered off for a single moment, as a happy hum threatened to burst out of him. "Yes Doctor." He said reverently, as he followed Starscream into the room.

"Sit." Starscream pushed him down into the chair, and Perceptor couldn't help himself from babbling as the Seeker moved into the back to start prepping for the root canal.

"I went to a terrible dentist Wednesday, who was recommended to me...by somebody I saw Monday...who's the brother of a man I usually see Sundays." Perceptor began bringing up the correct screens for a root canal and prepping himself.

"Their mother taught them everything they know. She's gifted, but elderly. People think she shouldn't be working. I go to her because I'm just incredibly devoted to her strength. She can't really see who you are, but she knows the sound of your voice. If you tell her where it is, the problem, she eventually finds it and she does it. I wish I had that stamina. I can only go so long. That's how I want to be. I don't ever want to have to be just—"

Starscreams optics narrowed as he wondered if the mech in the chair ever stopped talking. Instead he turned around, and yanked the chair downwards harshly, so the red microscope was lying out flat. "Comfy?"

"Yes." Preceptor squeaked, looking up with wide blue optics.

"Good." All teeth bared in a self-serving smile, and Starscream went to go pull out his instruments.

Perceptor sat up, and began eagerly placing cotton rolls in his mouth as he began to babble once more. "I remember the first time l went to a dentist. I thought, 'What a neat job! If only I were a dentist.' The dentist I went to had the greatest car. He had a Corvette. Everybody calls him ''Doctor'' and he's not really a doctor. And- oh Primus-" Perceptor nearly stopped his babbling as Starscream yanked our a shining metallic instrument that looked menacing and threatening.

His vocalizer didn't need prompting from his CPU to continue babbling. "I got out of there okay, but after it was all finished...they gave me a candy bar. I thought, 'I get a candy bar?' You go through that and get chocolate. You work with incredible professionals, using incredibly wonderful equipment…"

Starscream turned with a wide smile, and said softly, "Open your mouth."

Perceptor opened wide.

In went the drill, and started grinding at a central nerve. Perceptor moaned softly as his back arched slightly, but he kept his head perfectly still. The drill bit even deeper, and Perceptor howled in delight.

"Oh, yes! Primus yes! Don't stop! Right there!"

Startled, Starscream shoved the drill in deeper, and Perceptor shuddered in ecstatcy as the pain translated into pleasure. "Oh, Primus! Yes! Yes! Yes! Don't stop doc! Don't stop! C'mon, more! More!"

Unnerved, Starscream moved into a different place, and jumped as Perceptor molested the bottom set of his wings, curling around them flirtingly. "Who's gonna have another chocolate bar! Wahoo!"

Starscream twisted out of Perceptors grip, throwing his tools onto the tray as he backed up, before pointing at the door. "Get out!"

Perceptor slowly spat out the cotton swabs, as he sat up. "What's wrong?" The innocent question nearly made Starscream break down into hysterics.

"GET OUT!"

Starscream stormed down the hallway, before yanking open the door. "This way, and leave!"

Perceptor walked out the door, before turning, "You know, I'm gonna tell each and every one of my friends about you-"

Starscream shoved him, and flinched as one of his dentists tools fell to the ground with a loud clatter. Red optics narrowed in anger as he picked it up. "What is this?!" He screeched, and Perceptor smiled once, before Starscream slammed the door shut.

"Sicko." He muttered.

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_a/n: What? I know this will probably violate some rule, but I had too much fun with this scene. A combination of bunnies, from different posts. One was that Perceptor was a masochist, and another simply said 'Little Shop of Horrors'. Note to self: Don't watch old movies while reading fanfics. This was also a challenge fic to write something other then Red Alert, and kirin-saga has corrupted my CPU to write Perceptor. (Hah! Bet all of you thought it would be about Red, didn't you?)_

_Anyways, Read and Review please! I also got a poll going on about my next big story, so vote if you feel like it!_


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